It's baby season in our family! We have one smile-y, laughing little girl and another baby arriving any day now. So when author Vickie Ruben offered a guest post about babies I couldn't resist. Read about her experiences in the NICU and enter to win her book below.
More About Raising Jess
Raising Jess: A Story of Hope is the powerful story of one family’s survival when faced with adversity. Written with compassion, honesty, and humor, it tells of a family changed forever by the birth of a child with a rare chromosome deletion and their courageous decision to choose hope. Facing the challenges of caring for her daughter, marriage struggles, and the question of having more children, Vickie Rubin gives a glimpse in the world of her family and transformation while raising Jess. This beautiful, gripping memoir will delight and leave you wanting more.
More About Vickie Rubin
Vickie Rubin, M.S Ed. is a three-time award-winning author of the inspiring memoir Raising Jess: A Story of Hope. The memoir encompasses overcoming marriage struggles, having more children, and the sibling experience. Vickie's debut memoir won the 2022 Readers' Favorite Gold Medal Award for Non-Fiction and was a Finalist in the Best Book Award and Books Excellence Award for inspirational memoir.
She is an experienced public speaker and passionate advocate for families of children with
disabilities. Vickie's essays are published in Newsweek and featured in the Buffalo News and guest blogs worldwide. She is a frequent Podcast guest sharing information about raising a child with a disability, inspiring hope, family dynamics, education, and advocacy. Her blog, Vickie's Views, gives a heartwarming and humorous view of everyday life, including raising a child with a disability, observing daily life, family, marriage, and RV travel.
Before writing her book, Vickie was the director of the Early Childhood Direction Center (ECDC) for Oishei Children’s Hospital, Kaleida Health, a New York State Education Department grant-funded program. Vickie and her husband Mitch celebrated their 44rd wedding anniversary in 2023. They have three children, three grandchildren, and two very active dogs.
A Little Extra
Stop by the Muffin for my interview with Vickie Rubin and a list of all her stops during her blog tour HERE.
Guest Post from Vickie Rubin
Rocking Babies in the NICU: Bringing Comfort and Connection to Newborns
Picture yourself cradling a tiny human, barely tipping the scales at two pounds. The infant is attached to life-sustaining machines that monitor their heart, oxygen, and respiration rate. Various tubes provide essential nourishment and air. The newborn is swaddled like a cocoon and snuggled in your arms; you are a compassionate stranger helping a newborn acclimate to the world. This is one of the lucky babies well enough to be held by a Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU) Baby Rocker. I was one of those privileged rockers among an eclectic group of volunteers.
Our daughter, Jessica, started her life in the NICU. She was born small-for-date, meaning that at nine months, Jess weighed 4.5 pounds. Later, we found out that our daughter had significant disabilities, but at that time, we only knew she was our small, petite baby girl.
Touch
I knew that I wanted to return the generosity to other NICU families. For several years, prior to Covid, I volunteered in a Level 4 NICU, which cares for the most complex and critically ill newborns. Mothers, fathers, and grandparents gently rocked their loved ones who were fighting for their lives. Beeping monitors and numerous tubes attached to their child are a constant reminder of their baby's fragility. Other families rested their hands through incubator doors to provide an essential touch if their newborn could not leave their nest's controlled environment.
Touch is vital for a newborn’s development and is especially comforting for sick or premature babies. Did you know that touching newborns can help regulate their temperature, heart rate, and breathing? A hand on a newborn helps them feel safe. Touch can also help with digestion and neurological function.
Yet, some babies are alone in their plexiglass world, with the noise of pumps, oxygen, and alarms ringing all day and night. This was not because the infant didn’t have a caring family. Many young families have young children at home and are unable to spend entire days with their newborn in the NICU. Some babies live in the NICU for months, and the parents eventually need to go back to work. Other families traveled a great distance to get the expertise of a level 4 NICU and could not stay in a hotel for weeks or months on end.
Care
That is when my fellow NICU rockers and I provided the most needed care. We are women and men, some with medical expertise, but most are non-medical folks. Many of us are retired and want to care for the newest generation. We rocked, sang, touched, and talked to the struggling babies, providing the essential connection that is so vital after birth. Garbed in yellow isolation gowns, gloves, and masks, we swaddle that baby with love, comfort, and a human touch.
My first time rocking was frightening. What if I accidentally pulled out a tube, held the baby wrong, or didn’t recognize an emergency? All those fears faded when the nurse gently placed the first NICU baby in my arms. All my motherly love and instincts snapped into place, and I was just a woman holding a beautiful baby. I sang songs, sometimes played music, looked into their eyes, and told them, "This will improve. You are loved, and we are so happy you are here, little one."
Not Always Smooth
Yes, there were mishaps. I am known to be a bit of a germaphobe, so volunteering in the NICU was sometimes a challenge. My most memorable moment was when a tube detached from the infant I was cradling. Blood spurted everywhere, including my gown! I tried to remain calm until a nurse rescued the baby, “ me,” and repaired the faulty tube. After the baby was safe, I became overcome with worry. I had a cut on my arm and was concerned about the possibility of blood contamination. Not knowing why the baby was in the NICU, I was concerned about the risk of a blood-transmitted disease. I had young grandchildren at home; was I endangering their health by helping other babies?
The nurse suggested I go to Employment Health to discuss the incident. The head nurse in employee health sensed my anxiety. She looked up the health record and, without defying HIPAA, told me that I was not at risk from this helpless infant. This brief incident increased my awe of the medical professionals who work daily under these conditions.
A Privilege
There were more moments of genuine peace and warmth, which could be one of the most important things to give a newborn and their family. You are not alone, little one. The world is full of kindness, love, and compassionate strangers. And an occasional anxious volunteer who overcomes their nonsense to provide loving care. I am thankful for the privilege of rocking so many babies.
Want A Free Book?
You could enter to win three copies of Raising Jess and a $25 Amazon gift card. You only have until August 9 to enter to win!
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